University of Alabama Sues India

This week, the trustees of the University of Alabama filed suit in federal court against the Republic of India, alleging that India's latest tourist brochure touting its elephant herds infringes on UA's trademark of the mascot known as "Big Al." According to a statement released by the University of Alabama's Minister of Information Shaw N. O'Class, the University "only seeks to defend its image and reputation by protecting its trademarks." O'Class said that the University has offered India a licensing agreement, but that the Indian government balked, citing the fact that there are no "respectable" Indian restaurants in Tuscaloosa. Indian officials, many of whom are Hindus, are also said to have been offended by UA football fans' repeated references to their cross-state rival as a "cow college."

A UA administration official, speaking on the condition of anonymity, said that "although University attorneys have some doubts as to whether it is possible to sue an entire country," they realize that a settlement could be financially beneficial to the University, so "they're willing to take the chance...plus, India needs all the friends they can get, seeing as how the Pakistanis are always causing such a ruckus."

The case, filed in the Northern District Court of Alabama, is University of Alabama Trustees v. Manmohan Singh, Prime Minister of the Republic of India.